No Flirting!!

Guy: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
Gal: Yes, and I am a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours!

Guy: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
Gal: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too!

Guy: How did you get to be so beautiful?
Gal: I bet, I must have been given your share!

Guy: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
Gal: Sorry! I am having a headache this weekend!

Guy: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
Gal: OK, Get the hell Out!

Guy: I think, I could make you very happy.
Gal: Sure, I think you are leaving now?

Guy: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Gal: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!

Guy: Can I have your name?
Gal: Why, don't you already have one?

Guy: Shall we go and see a Movie?
Gal: I've already seen it!

Guy: Do you think it was fate that brought us together?
Gal: Nah, it was plain bad luck!

Guy: Where have you been all my life?
Gal: Hiding from you.

Guy: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Gal: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Guy: Is this seat empty?
Gal: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations.. .

(1.) At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:- Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

(2.) In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:- No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't you try again.

(3.) At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?

(4.) At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:- Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:- No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.

(5.) At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years... Stupid Question:- Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:- Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

(6.) When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:- No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

(7.) When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you dumb witted moron.

(8.) When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I'm shedding.... ..

(9.) At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:- No it wont. It will just bleed.

(10.) You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:- Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:- Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

husband vs wife diary..

--------HER DIARY---------
This evening, I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a cafe to have some coffee. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late,but he made no comment.Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent.I asked him what was wrong - he said,"Nothing."I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving.I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say,"I love you,too." When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV.

He seemed distant and absent. Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed. I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep.I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

---------HIS DIARY---------
Today Australia lost the cricket test against England.
DAMN IT

Strange laws....

Here's our fabulous collection of Strange Laws that can
date back very far. Most of these laws remain in the books
today, even if rarely enforced.

• In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.[ bow bow,meow meow...]
  
• In North Carolina, it is against the law for dogs and cats to fight.[ poor dogs :-) ]
  
• In Georgia, it's against the law to spread a false rumor.[ i think this one s necessary...]
  
• In Virginia, chickens cannot lay eggs before 8:00 a.m., and must be done before 4:00 p.m.[ this s crrazy ]
  
• In Kentucky, it's the law that a person must take a bath once a year.[ mm lucky people]